{"id":4582,"date":"2022-01-06T15:39:16","date_gmt":"2022-01-06T15:39:16","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/zuschlag.us\/?page_id=4582"},"modified":"2025-01-12T22:56:52","modified_gmt":"2025-01-12T22:56:52","slug":"building-a-new-house","status":"publish","type":"page","link":"https:\/\/zuschlag.us\/?page_id=4582","title":{"rendered":"Building a New House"},"content":{"rendered":"

So the truth is, we didn\u2019t just decide to sell the farm and then suddenly say \u201cokay, let\u2019s build a house.\u201d\u00a0 First of all, the house had been an id\u00e9e fixe<\/em> of mine since even before I bought my first acres.\u00a0 The idea of a Country House<\/strong> and all that it signified was foremost in my mind when I began searching for a country property in the early 1990s. \u00a0I distinctly remember being horrified when a group of friends who had joined me on my search one day began telling me over lunch all the features that I \u2018must\u2019 have for my house.\u00a0 \u201cOh<\/em>\u201d said Ann Marie, \u201cAnd you\u2019ve got to have space for an outdoor clothesline! It\u2019s the best!<\/em>\u201d \u201cA clothesline?<\/strong><\/em>\u2019\u2019 I repeated incredulously.\u00a0 It was clear that every single one of them was envisioning a quaint little rustic farmhouse or cabin, while I was contemplating Chatsworth.\u00a0 When I sketched out on a napkin what I had in mind, they all fell silent.\u00a0 Clearly they were all embarrassed on my behalf and not quite sure to how to break it to me that my ambitions were far outsized for my budget.<\/p>\n

And that, I think, has been the problem ever since.\u00a0 When I first found the land that would become Touchstone Farm, it was with Touchstone Hall in mind that I chose the scrubby overgrown parcel.\u00a0 If I could clear this one miserable patch of woods it would be an excellent site to build the house of my dreams.<\/p>\n

And so I bought the place, and over the years struggled to build the adjoining guest house (the tiny one bedroom garage apartment I\u2019ve been living in for the past 25 years), the walled gardens that would flank the house, and the garden outbuildings that would cap the gardens. \u00a0Also over the years I would add more land to my holdings so that the house site eventually would be in the center of a larger farm. \u00a0In my mind I was a mini-Le Notre, clearing land to create all\u00e9es and dredging the pond to enlarge it to fit the geometry of the all\u00e9e as it related to the future house site.\u00a0 I refurbished the large barn and planted trees in a far field to screen out a neighbor and create a distant view from the eventual house site.\u00a0 On the other side of the farm, I played mini-Capability Brown – planting trees and gently taming the landscape of my fields to form pastoral scenes visible from any window in my still non-existent house.<\/p>\n

That was my dream. \u00a0For the past 26 years I have always held the idea of this house in my mind and how it was placed in the landscape \u2018just so.\u2019\u00a0\u00a0 Of course when I began this process the thought was that this future house would be only a few years off \u2013 I\u2019d win the lottery, make a killing, marry a rich man, inherit a fortune, etc.\u00a0 Something would happen.\u00a0 As I aged, that dream never disappeared, but the money never appeared either.\u00a0 I couldn\u2019t give it up, so I just put it off.\u00a0 I would rationalize to myself, \u201cwell, as long as I have the house built by age 50<\/em>.\u201d\u00a0 When 50 came and went, I started to panic. \u00a0No money ever came, I was married to a pauper, saddled with a large mortgage, and I was pretty certain (correctly as it turned out) my mother would do her best to dis-inherit me. \u00a0So, what to do with my dreams if they couldn\u2019t be realized?<\/p>\n

Whining to friends and family didn\u2019t help.\u00a0 \u201cWhat\u2019s wrong with just converting the garage space into living areas and creating a small bedroom addition<\/em>?\u201d\u00a0 \u201cYou know, I bet if you sold your farm, you could get a nice house in our subdivision.\u00a0 Toll Brothers\/Ryan Homes\/Van Meter is building some really nice ones, you could even probably afford some of the upgrades!\u201d\u00a0\u00a0 <\/em><\/p>\n

So what to do?\u00a0 No offense to those who live there, but suburban or urban living is akin to a slow suicide in my book, and I\u2019d be deeply unhappy living so close to other people (Actually, over time Keith has gotten even more ferocious about this than I have).\u00a0 Selling off entirely and starting afresh seemed like the only answer, but how to sell off 26 years of planting, earthmoving, and designing to someone else?\u00a0 They\u2019d need to share my vision, or otherwise why would anyone even take it on? \u00a0Having sold enough properties in the area, I knew only too well at how much of a discount other people\u2019s unfinished dreams sold for.<\/p>\n

So when we naively did the math for selling off part of the farm, the logic was this: 1) sell off enough land to pay off the mortgage; 2) Take advantage of super low interest rates and collateralize the remaining farm for a large construction loan; 3) build a scaled down version of Touchstone Hall and leave most of the interiors unfinished; and 4) work like the devil for the next 10-15 years to pay off the mortgage. \u00a0Then die.<\/p>\n

It made sense on paper. \u00a0Thus we began.\u00a0 The first bits were easy. \u00a0We sold half the farm, then qualified for a nice fat construction loan, and we then started looking for someone to turn our dreams into reality.<\/p>\n

Of course, someone as pig-headed as I am is an architect\u2019s worst nightmare.\u00a0 I know just enough to be dangerous and demanding, and not enough to know why my demands are stupid or unbuild-able. \u00a0Worse than that was having 35 years of accrued fantasies, sketches in my head, and sketches on paper of exactly what the house would look like.\u00a0 Lastly, in our circle of friends, I\u2019d say at least \u00bc of them are architects (and good ones!).\u00a0 Professionally I know about a dozen more.\u00a0 Who to choose?\u00a0 Even one of my brothers is an architect, for heaven\u2019s sake!\u00a0 Whose friendship would be strong enough to weather my client tantrums?\u00a0\u00a0 Well, as it turned out, an architect was a non-starter for two additional reasons:\u00a0 1) we couldn\u2019t afford one; and 2) we couldn\u2019t afford the additional year that it would take for them to design what I already had in mind.\u00a0 This whole project rested on getting it done while prices and interest rates were still low.<\/p>\n

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Could this be what we wind up with?<\/figcaption><\/figure>\n

So instead we opted for a very good builder with a very good reputation for design\/build and coming in on budget. \u00a0And with the help of an excellent draftsman, we got started.\u00a0 At first it was pretty seamless.\u00a0 We gave him all our plans, dreams, pinterest pages, the very tight building footprint, and basically said \u201cmake it so.\u201d And he did. \u00a0Our template was a traditional Virginian manor house.\u00a0 I\u2019ve seen enough of them over the years (and sold enough of them as well) to know what has endured and become timeless (basically Georgian or nothing). \u00a0That was (and still is) very much the key.\u00a0 I did not want to build something that was \u2018of the moment\u2019 or that incorporated anything that smacked of suburban \u2018McMansion.\u2019\u00a0 Yet, at the same time, I wanted to incorporate the latest technology in making it super energy efficient and low maintenance. How to do this??\u00a0 That, unfortunately, halfway through the building process, is still the question.\u00a0 (True confession: In my darkest hours I fear that we may have tipped over the edge to McMansion-ville).<\/p>\n

At any rate, by January 2021 the plans were pretty much completed and the builder had cost it all out.\u00a0 Of course, everyone knows what happens next.\u00a0 This is such a common trope that Hollywood has endlessly recycled it to the amusement of moviegoers over the past century.\u00a0 Mister Blandings Builds His Dream House<\/em> <\/a>pretty much nails it to perfection, though The Money Pit<\/em><\/a> describes the financial aspects quite succinctly. After cutting back everything we possibly could (do we really <\/em>need a kitchen?\u00a0 According to Keith, we do!), we came up with a budget that was exactly twice the number I had imagined.\u00a0 Sighing, we gave them the go-ahead and signed the contract.<\/p>\n

Then, nothing happened.\u00a0 Then suddenly we got a call from the builder.\u00a0 Prices were going up.\u00a0 We needed to stockpile building materials ahead of those increases.\u00a0 Could they create a \u2018staging area\u2019 now?\u00a0 Yes, they could.\u00a0 Also, windows were set to have a massive price increase.\u00a0 You need to decide IMMEDIATELY what windows we are going to use.\u00a0 Your budget is X, as per contract.\u00a0 Give me your answer now!\u00a0\u00a0 And that set the template for the rest of the year.\u00a0\u00a0 We need a decision on \u201cX\u201d now!\u00a0<\/em> So, the downside of having a draftsman draw your plans is that, while you get a house that looks like what you want, and has all the engineering and electric and plumbing schematics in place, there\u2019s just vague notations instead of detailed drawings for actual interior \u2018stuff.\u2019\u00a0 These are the very things where architects really ARE handy.\u00a0 They\u2019ve worked with various lighting systems in the past and know what to use and not to use.\u00a0 They\u2019ve used Anderson\/Pella\/Marvin windows in the past and know which ones would suit this project best.\u00a0 Yes, the builder has had experience with these things too, but at the end of the day the builder is going opt for \u2018builder grade\u2019 and (surprise!) that \u2018builder grade\u2019 is what the budget calls for.\u00a0 Now, in my defense, I knew this going into the project.\u00a0 There would be tons and tons and tons of really important decisions to make \u2013 both major and minute.\u00a0 But honestly, that was the part of the process I thought I would enjoy.\u00a0 And I actually would have enjoyed it \u2013 if not for everything that happened next.\u00a0 This perfect storm of attention drains in 2021 meant that I had no time to make any of these decisions. \u00a0My big fear was (and still is) making the wrong decision and having to live the rest of my life with the consequences.\u00a0 I wanted the luxury of time (and it truly is a luxury) to look at all the options, read the reviews, talk to people who have the same things and hear their opinions, and generally investigate all options before making the definitive choice.<\/p>\n

Ha!\u00a0 Dream on. What a rude shock!\u00a0 The pandemic, supply chain issues, and price shocks meant that half the stuff wasn\u2019t even available and what was available was ONLY available on-line (which meant staring at a tiny misleading photo on my computer screen) and making a choice based on that and a few online reviews.<\/p>\n

Not having an expert to guide me meant having to do a deep, deep dive on minutiae I didn\u2019t have time for (do I want 12V or 24V LED lights for cabinet under mounts \u2013 but wait, here\u2019s another option that isn\u2019t even low voltage, would that work even better?).\u00a0 Do you want this faucet or that faucet \u2013 there are only 286 choices?\u00a0 Okay, you want that<\/em> faucet, but if you use it with this<\/em> particular sink you want you\u2019re going to have to tell us how high you want the faucet to be above the sink bowl, because it ain\u2019t standard.\u00a0 And so on.\u00a0 Every. Single. Day.<\/p>\n

Keith, besides being somewhat aesthetically challenged, had his own crises to deal with (tests, condo, surgery) and couldn\u2019t be bothered to obsess over details. Of course, that made it worse.\u00a0 I don\u2019t mind making the decisions, but I do very much mind listening to the aftermath for the next 20 years (why\u2019d you ever pick this piece of crap?\u00a0\u00a0 I hate this xxx, I certainly would have chosen something better<\/em>!).\u00a0\u00a0 So I exasperated him as much as I could \u201cLook, I only need you to focus on this right now.\u00a0 Do we want these shower knobs or those?\u201d <\/em>and for as long as I could (not long), before he\u2019d give up and say, \u201cOh I don\u2019t care!\u201d<\/em> That was good enough for me and gave me ammunition for the inevitable argument years hence (Keith: \u201cWhy do we have these blankety-blank shower knobs!!<\/em>\u201d\u00a0 Alan: \u201cI gave you a choice!<\/em>\u201d).<\/p>\n

The whole year I just dreamt of a time when I would not have to decide whether we wanted soapstone or granite (or wait, maybe quartzite?) or, which is better for us, closed cell or open cell insulation (or wait, aren\u2019t both of them just overkill in our climate)? It was beyond draining.\u00a0 And this process, along with every other thing the year threw at us, was just something to get through – knowing that eventually, eventually, God willing eventually, it would all be done.\u00a0 The mantra of the year was \u201ca year from now, all of this will be behind me.\u00a0 A year from now, all of this will be behind me.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

And here we are with 2021 finished, and, to some degree all of the major house decisions have <\/em><\/strong>been made.\u00a0 For better or worse, I can\u2019t go back now. \u00a0I still have to finalize the tile selections in the bathrooms, but other than that, it\u2019s all been decided.\u00a0 No more sleepless nights worrying about exactly where on the wall a wall washer light should hit and whether the color temperature (2700K) was the right choice for those recessed lights (it is).<\/p>\n

Of course, there have been a few disasters and a few tantrums thrown (No! That is NOT acceptable!<\/em>), but by and large it is all working out. \u00a0Or it will work out eventually.<\/p>\n

The key lessons learned in this process are:<\/p>\n